chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
Some guy wearing a horse mask just knocked on my door and started whinnying. I opened the door and he was like, "...oh sorry, wrong room..." so awk.
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
He said "I can't wait for you to feel me inside of you so I can tell you gently that you're mine" and left me a 4 minute voice mail of him crying after I told him I didn't want to be with him. 30 year olds are off limits.
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
Randomize
