Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
man, i hate rosetta stone. i wanted to impress this girl with italian last night but all i could say were things like "a blue airplane" and "he is wearing a white shirt"
Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
Randomize
