Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
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