I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
I just met his mom for the first time with a hang over. Then we went to watch his 8 year old cousin get baptized. Apparently his family loves me. I should drink more often.
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
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