So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
Randomize
