I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
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