i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
we're so committed to being not committed
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize
