You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
I'm staying at his house to solve the homeless situation. There's a freezer bag of weed in the fridge. He doesn't know it's there, and he's not missing it so I may have an income soon.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
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