So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
Downstairs neighbor just asked me to tell people when they jump off the balcony next time not to land on her flowers
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
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