Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
How many times can I tell him I wasnt expecting sex before he realizes I'm just too lazy to shave all the time?
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
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