Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
I'm just going to tell you this I knocked up your girlfriend. I didn't mean to I thought it was somebody else I wasn't drunk but it was dark.
The truth is better her than my wife.
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