feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
Dude, it's the frankincense and myrrh soap. Smelling like baby Jesus will get you laid.
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
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