Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
My girlfriend figured out who you are.
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
i just had to wipe vomit off my fone to text you. yeah that hungover.
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
Fell in the ditch running from the pizza guy I stole the pizza from. If you are still at my house come find me, pretty sure I need stitches.
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
Randomize
