Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
I got the shit slapped outta me last night but the pain in my jaw doesn’t even compare to the hangover I have.
Randomize
