Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
Why did my mother make you get naked?
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
We're hate flirting, damnit.
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