I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
Randomize
