I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
If one more person says Merry Christmas to me I’m going to take a pen out of my pocketbook and stab them in the eye
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
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