maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
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