Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
Randomize
