Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
Randomize
