hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
if my 20s were a chapter in my autobiography, it would be called "the room is spinning and my hands smell like dick"
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