Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
oh god was she eating orange peels again
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
Told him I just wanted to be friends. He responded, "The best marriages are born from great friendships." Please come get me.
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
Randomize
