I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
see... this is why i put birth control in all my friends drinks
wait.... you do what?
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
I was just walking down the hall and passed a very pregnant girl wearing a shirt that said "blame it on the aaaaaa-alcohol." I can't decide if she's brilliantly witty or just pointing fingers.
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
I showed up to a job interview wearing two different shoes. If that's not an omen, I don't know what is.
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
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