I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
You came out of the bathroom, said "I'M DRUNK BUT I REMEMBERED TO WASH MY HANDS!" and then insisted that she smell them.
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
Randomize