There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
Hurry up. We're trading phones to prevent drunk texting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
Stop trying to get me to choose vodka over a nap
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