just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
i accidentally sent all my draft messages..how do i do damage control for the multiple "fuck me now" type msgs sent at ten am?
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
Randomize
