worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
Just talked to the girl you brought home from the bar last night while she was looking for her panties. She said to tell you "nice try".
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
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he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
She wore that goddamn strap-on all night. When she was playing guitar hero it kept getting in the way but she just wouldn't take it off.
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
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Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
At the start of the night I was all 'come at me universe' and three hours later I was ordering an extra large pizza in bed in the dress I had gone out in. Well played universe.
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
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