so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
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