i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
Just cropdusted the office
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
Randomize
