is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
I'm literally in my bed still trying to find the energy to take my corset off so I can binge eat oreos
How does it feel to date your dad?
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
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