How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When my alarm went off, he rolled over and asked me: Bacon or dick? Yes, I will see him again.
The bosnian sent me a sext with his dick next to a comcast remote. It went up to the "stop" button. Ironic and appropriate. Grab your remote and imagine it.
You've ruined television for me.
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
Someone put a huge skyy vodka bottle in our washing machine. My roommate didn't see it and ran it. The washing machine split in two. #life
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
i believe in u and ur pee
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
Randomize