I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
the bouncer watched the girl drop her ID, saw me pick it up and say OMG SHE LOOKS LIKE ME, and then let me use it to get into the bar
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
Randomize
