does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
the best part about watching a meteor shower at 4 am is being able to masturbate in public and drink hot chocolate at the same time.
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
Randomize
