The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
I just woke up to three voicemails from you. In the first one you just straight laughed for 3 minutes. In the second you did bird calls. In the third you were hysterically crying. Have fun last night?
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
My mom just woke me up with a cowboy hat and sunglasses on. It's 7 am and she's drunk.
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
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