we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
How dare sober me try to tell drunk me I can't eat the applesauce in the fridge! Stingy bitch IM EATING THE APPLESAUCE! you can tell sober me I said that.
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
Randomize
