well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
Getting a high five from your dog when you're stoned is one the greatest rewards of being a pet owner.
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
You went into the bathroom, got in the tub with a pillow, yelled "this isn't as comfortable as it looks in the movies" then passed out
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
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