when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
I was 10 minutes late leaving for lunch today because I couldn't lose a boner. It is impossible to tuck it when your shirt is tucked in...gotta quit facebook stalking hot chicks at work
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
the back of my hand read, "say no to drugs." my palm read, "say yes to shots." when the fuck did I write that?
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
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