the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
Emily is drunk. We're coming to see you at work and we're bringing jello shots for you.
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
PS: I just woke up from my shower
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
