i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
I feel like I should pray to the god of Febreze, because it is like it washes away the smell of all my sins from the bed
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
Randomize
