Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
If Billy Mays did an infomercial on your dick, it still wouldn't get you laid.
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
Randomize
