He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
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