not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
Posting happy birthday to my grandpa on Facebook.... Then realizing my profile pic is me dressed as a slutty cop when he used to be a police officer.
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
So. My mom went grocery shopping for me while I was at work & brought the food here. Cool bc my dildo was laying on the counter. Forgot I left it out. I am sure she saw. Im mortified.
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
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