It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
Last night was a blur. All I remember is jizzing in the squeegee bucket at a gas station.
The look on the soccer mom's face was PRICELESS.
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
Dude. I’m playing chess through iMessage with a stripper. What has my life become.
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
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