I heard we made out
**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
You told me that you couldn't come over because you felt like you were gonna die and that houses eat you when you die, and my house couldn't eat you because your house would be jealous. That's when I knew to take the bowl away from you.
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