I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
How come I'm the only one who's around when people show up? I had just taken a shit, I wasn't wearing pants, phantom of the opera was playing and the fridge said PENIS.
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
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