everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
The bartender gave me a roll of masking tape so I could tape my heels to my feet so I wouldn't lose them when i went drunk running later that night
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
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