Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
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