six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
I just got carded by a ten year old.
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
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