That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
And the cops told us we were all naked.
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
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