I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
I'm just going to text him the word sex repeatedly until he comes over.
Did it work?
Duh, it only took 27 texts and 15 minutes and he was at my front door.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
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